Top 24 Men: The Performances

Todrick Hall - "Since U Been Gone" (sang first, +1)
Okay, I have to give him points for guts here; clearly this was a re-arrangement he thought up himself, this Bobby-Browning of "Since U Been Gone." He made a statement, that re-arrangement isn't just for the guitar boys, and that deserves a tip of the hat. But boy, did that not sound good.

Aaron Kelly - "Here Comes Goodbye" (Rascal Flatts +2)
The stage presence needs a LOT of work, but this is a decent niche for Aaron, and he certainly hit his big note. On the Boy Singer scale, he's well ahead of Kevin Covais but behind David Archuleta.

Jermaine Sellers - "Get Here"
And once again, everybody who didn't pick Oleta Adams as their artist lives in regret. Holy crap, that was screechy! Man alive. And while I appreciated that Jermaine threw in fewer gratuitous runs than he usually does. And I certainly appreciated the Tony Rich-style hat. But that was some severe awfulness, and it was only the awfulness to come that makes me think Jermaine might survive the week.

Tim Urban - "Apologize"
You're welcome, Jermaine, because that further awfulness started right here. Tim Urban seems like a nice guy, cute as a button, all that. But we've seen him a few times throughout this season, and I'll posit that he hasn't been good even once. This was certainly no different. How do you sing this song if you have a shitty falsetto? HOW??

Joe Munoz - "You and I"
(A thousand apologies, I can't make the tilde happen on Blogger.) Faint props for at least choosing a Jason Mraz song that hasn't been beaten into the ground by this show. And Joe sang it solidly okay. But is this not so the typical Previously Unseen Guy performance that isn't nearly enough to overcome is heretofore invisibility?

Tyler Grady - "American Woman"
Here we fucking go. Jesus. I am not equipped to handle any bit of Tyler Grady. And honestly, for such a crazy ROCKER, this was a strangely anemic performance. One that ended before it ever felt like he'd properly ramped up. Thank you, Simon, for the "Pretend to Be a Rock Star school" line, because YES. Though, in Tyler's defense, I will say Kara's got balls to chastize Tyler for wallowing in the same '70s rock style she could not shut up about last week.

Lee Dewyze - "Chasing Cars"
Aw, so Lee's gonna be our Lockjaw Guy for the season, then? Whatever, I instinctively like him, and this song was a nice idea that he carried off decently well, but hit some notes, guy! I am glad Simon refuted Randy's "Be a hard-rocking King of Leon" silliness.

John Park - "God Bless the Child"
Once again, dig how on the ball I am. I said: "These standards are such non-starters for me. What does it even prove, ESPECIALLY if you don't sing it all that well?" And there was Simon, calling the whole thing "pointless." Yes. And I love John Park. And I'm glad he's committed to making a go of it with Shania, on a personal level. But he really overdid it with that beautiful bottom end of his. The voice is strong, it was just not well deployed.

Michael Lynche - "This Love"
The whiplash as I mentally career from so-skinny-he-barely-exists Adam Levine to the heft of Big Mike is severe. But as limited as this performance was (and I think Mike is generally a limited singer), so many people were worse, and he's got personality for days. He'll be fine.

Alex Lambert - "Wonderful World"
Oh, poor thing. He's gone, right? I'll say that I love him for still wanting to stick it to Mary Powers. And he let Ellen unleash that weird, affectionate, and oddly correct banana metaphor about him (not to be confused with the banana metaphors Kara would be throwing during Casey's performance). But this was really terrible.

Casey James - "Heaven"
You know, Kara (and Randy, and Simon, and Ryan) is really fucking with my ability to enjoy Casey James. And I do enjoy Casey James. On a night of sad, flailing performances, Casey knew exactly what he wanted to do, picked the right song, and played his cards perfectly. Calculating? Absolutely. But I'll take it, at this stage. And, sorry, Bryan Adams's "Heaven" hits me right in the center of my cheese-filled heart. Casey's gonna be the divisive one this season, for sure. Just try to budge anyone on either side of the Casey divide. But I like him.

Andrew Garcia - "Sugar, We're Going Down" (sang last, +2)
Andrew's lesson is similar to Todrick's: the mere fact of rearranging a song is not what makes it good. It has to be rearranged well. This wasn't awful, and I like Fall Out Boy fine for what they are. But, again, points for nerve. Even if Randy was kind of right (!) in calling the performance "tryhard."

Going Home? Yikes, so many possibilities! Is it too simple to just say Alex and Tim? They're certainly going to end up splitting each other's votes (and those votes are Aaron Kelly's to begin with). Wouldn't rule out Joe, Jermaine, or John (sad day for my brothers in "J"), but I'll go an pick a floppy-haired massacre tonight.